Taking Action: It's a State Thing

I've been frustrated about my inability to do what I know I should, hell, even what I want to do!  There have been many times that I've wanted to go for a walk and get some fresh air, and yet, I seemed to be powerless as I sat reading or watching videos on my laptop.

Yesterday evening, I took a nap, and when I woke up, I was trying to think myself into getting up. My thoughts seemed clear, and yet my body continued to just lie there.

Suddenly, it occurred to me that when I do things, my mind is clear!  I was able to tune into this different mindset, and boom! I was able to get up.

This was such an epiphany for me!

I've become much more certain in the need for men to speak about men's issues.  If we don't, we will continue to be demonized by the feminists and social justice warriors.

And feminism needs to be seen for what it is: a female supremacy movement.  The suggestion that it's about equal rights has never been true.  Feminists point at differences, and say things are unfair.  There is a lot that can be different between the lives of 2 individuals with zero unfairness.  I might choose to write a blog, and you might be happier just to read the thoughts of others.  There's nothing inherently unfair about either of these conditions.

This has been sitting in my drafts.. Clearly, I was too afraid to publish it back then. Which is itself a problem: men face tremendous social risks in speaking up: they can be shunned by entire groups because 1 woman says she was uncomfortable with something he said...



I've seen the MeToo posts, and felt a mix of confusion, shame and anger. The shame is the fear of being associated with behavior that's hurt others.

It's hard to admit that I have done things that pushed boundaries and hurt others. Thus the shame. There's also the fear that I'm being lumped in with others that have done worse.

And there's anger at being silenced. Being told that it's not about me, even though I too have feelings. And then I wonder, am I being insensitive? Do I owe it to others to support them? And where do my needs to look after myself and my needs fit in?

There's also the sense of injustice at being seen and associated with only the worst things. What about the hundreds of people I've supported through listening, empathy and actions? What about the impact on the lives of women who have been grateful that I was there for them, supporting them in their struggles and helping them find their way to strength?

If I am raked over the coals for my behavior, one of the implications seems to be that others have not done harm. When will be the day of confession for women? Do they have any awareness of the pain that men live through? The pain that I've lived through in my longing for connection?